GO Duane Reade.

...for having the slowest fucking cashiers in the world.

I mean it's bad enough that Duane Reade has the most, bland, unappealing aesthetic in the world...

(seriously, I know corporate franchises are suppose to individuality robbing institutions but damn!, does Duane Reade go the extra step to be so soul sucking boring)

...but on top of that they add the luxary of having to spend 5 minutes to buy a bottle of soda.

I don't even blame the cashiers for being slow because let's face it; working at Duane reade is like...well working at Duane Reade. I can't even think of anything more depressing. Bad enough a part of me wants to stab myself just to feel some signs of life as I traverse their aisles but why do i have to spend so many minutes dying when I just want to get overpriced soda.

I don't need a bag, I don't need a straw, I don't need a foot and a half long reciept with full return policy printed on back to tell me I overpaid for soda because i'm a picky bastard.







You know how they say the rapture will come in 2000 years and everyone will be judged...well the rapture came but it decided to be far more penal and methodical and decided to take form of Duane Reade.