Where are the balls???

This is something that has been bothering me for the past 2 years or so. Something must be said. Where are the balls in rock? or in music general?

I am reffering to mainstream music, excluding rap and r&b. Where is the music that use to have power, badass riffs, and that special touch of machismo but not ovebearing chest thumping (unlike hip-hop) to get you off your seat and shout. All the new artists I am seeing today have one of these or all 3 of these very annoying qualities to them;

1) Dangerously skinny guys in very tight jeans and thick framed glasses looking stoned and retarded.
2) Bands with heavely bearded, granola looking wimpy dudes and one pasty chic. All looking incredibly pretentious and stoic.
3) Soft voiced, coffee shop favorites, British song birds...enough with those already.

We all know this is music age for the hipsters right now. We passed through the R&B phase, got through the Rap-rock phase and now we are in the "god im so sensitive" hipster douche bag phase...problem is that this phase is taking incredibly long. I can't remember the last time I pumped my fist in excitement over a totally bad ass riff filled song that came from a new emerging band. Ever since Audioslave broke up, no creative, unique hardrock band has stepped up. What we have instead is hordes of introspective, soft voiced, sensitive, thesauraus humping, simplistic beats creating sissy bands.

None of them even display any lasting power but god knows I can't fart without hearing about some mind blowing, next-it-thing band of, what else...but some hipsters, fruity looking people. When did eccentricity become a talent, enough to warrant praise!

What happened to The Artic Monkeys huh? they were suppose to be the next Beatles. I can't even count how many times I have heard Joni Mitchell comparasions about some new, cool-eccentric, female singer out of Britian. These bands and the media outlets that promote them need to be stopped.

..and speaking of Starbucks friendly British female songstresses...please stop already, enough. I am tired of going to starbucks and listening to a 10 BPM song about a broken heart from another chick who opened her mouth and soon enough had a record deal shoved in it. People go to Starbucks to get coffee (well normal people, not, attention whore, hipster trash with their macbooks) so they would likely prefer upbeat, dare I say, violent music. Why isn't RATM blaring in the speakers to alleviate the 3 p.m energy drain? Starbucks could sell this as a "Discover the classics" promotion because Sia certainly ain't doing it for me.

I miss the days of AC/DC, music that was fun. Well there is hope RATM will reunite.